The Birth of the Universe
by happyyethopeless
Summary: Memorizing derivative formulas, running around the campus track for three hours and fighting to overcome her drinking and hopping in one bed after another were all too easy for her. Not this. This was true rocket science. In a post Third Impact world, Misato's worst fears come true in the small town of Okinawa-2.
1. Prologue

_I don't own them_

* * *

**The Birth of the Universe**

"You do understand that, you have to be very mindful from now on. I know that I may be intruding in your business, Mrs. Ikari, but this neighborhood is very small. We all know each other and care for one another. There are barely any people in Okinawa-2 after the Third Impact. It's a miracle that a good number of us came back, but we still have to cherish those closest to us."

Misato nodded, "I didn't think that was possible."

"You're twenty years biologically younger," the doctor said. "You may think like an old woman but your body works like a twenty-three year old."

Misato laughed nervously, scratching the back of her head and her old Ray Bans on top. Her hands were sweaty and she needed a ginger ale to drink. Or maybe apple juice. She thought of beer but the thought of that drink in her stomach made her nauseous. No matter how hard she tried, she's never gone near Yebisu since she died and came back.

Dr. Matsumoto studied her with a tiny smile. He placed the clip board he held on his front desk. Misato's medical records from the time she surfaced from the sea of LCL were thick and clipped tight over the yellow board. On those papers was her new name, Aiko Ikari.

"You're going to have to come back here for another appointment next week Tuesday," the doctor said.

"Alright."

It was way too easy way back when she was in college.

Memorizing derivative formulas, running around the campus track for three hours and fighting to overcome her drinking and hopping in one bed after another were all too easy for her. Even Ritsuko's complex mind-numbing jargon was a breeze. Not this. _This_ was true rocket science.

She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, grimacing at maroon leather squeaking underneath her bottom. She tucked a purple strand behind her ear, noting that her hair now fell down her back, touching the small of her waist. It's been a long time since she cut it.

"What's going on in that mind of yours?" the doctor asked.

Since two civilians from the ruins of Toyko-3 found her naked, unconscious on white washed shores, Dr. Matsumoto had been the face she got used to during her first few months in a foreign place. At first glance, the old man reminded her of what her father would look like if he was still alive.

Misato turned to look out at falling white petals obscuring the bright sunlight on this Thursday afternoon. Sakura petals were more interesting.

"Would you be disappointed if I told you I want an abortion?" she asked.

"No," he said, still keeping that same smile. "I would be disappointed if you did it because you think you're not a capable mother. Even if you did try your hand in abortion, it would not be possible."

"I already know that."

To have an abortion meant scrounging up millions of yen to go overseas. The majority of abortion clinics in Japan have closed down. Medicinal herbs weren't sold much anymore, since the priority of the health system were the people surfacing from LCL. To get some meant traveling long miles to rural villages, and Misato just didn't have the time.

Abortion was more looked down on than before. People preached about re-population, claiming that it was needed since those who turned to LCL during the Third Impact might not return back from the sea.

Protection and birth control pills were always sold out. She tried abstinence, but with six feet worth of her good looking beau, she just couldn't resist. Having the occasional condom or pill was a godsend since they both always sold out quick, but for the most part, she and her husband settled with withdrawal. The problem with withdrawal was that_ he_ had to pull out in time or at least, she had to remind him sometimes.

"Misato," She turned her gaze to the old man's. "Once you get home and your husband returns, tell him before you scare yourself into not doing it."

"I understand."

"I know you're not cruel enough to leave this baby in a dumpster or have it adopted by strangers who might use it for trafficking. If you're frightened about how to take care of this child, do so by keeping it-"

"I get it!"

The doctor chuckled when Misato rolled her eyes like a little girl who was just grounded by her father, "See you next week."

Mikasa waved, ambling tiredly out of her doctor's office. She squinted at bright light in the form of sun rays, reveling in a cloudless toasty heat. Endless summer was the only gift from the Second Impact. More hot summers, a package from the Third, which worked well for all earthlings because of ice cream trucks, air conditions, more sex and swimming pools.

Her combat boots thumped against gray cracked concrete as she approached a dark blue vehicle far back within the parking lot. Entering her new model Renault Alpine, Misato dug out her cell phone. She was acutely aware of burning from behind her eyes.

"Yes?!" Ritsuko's exasperated voice was the last trigger.

For the first time since she lost Kaji, Misato cried like the world was ending.

"Misato? Oh my God, Misato…." Misato did not stop, wiping her tears until she just gave up on stopping the other ones that came.

Ritsuko stayed quiet until her sudden sobs died down, "Now can you tell me what's going on?"

"I'm having a baby."

The other end of the line stilled. A sigh crept out.

"That's wonderful," Ritsuko said quietly.

Misato broke down again, sounding like her pitiful thirteen year old self who was just forced to accept that she was now a woman because she had her period.

When she quieted, Ritsuko asked, "When are you going to tell Shinji?"

"Dr. Matsumoto says to tell him before I scare myself."

"That sounds like a good plan."

Misato nodded, "Yeah…"

Rituko stayed silent for a moment. Misato heard that sigh again.

"You know he'll be ecstatic, right?"

She looked out the window on her side, lulled by the glowing sun decked atop the white washed buildings making up the only hospital in this town.

Tiny beams obscured her vision, but she thought she saw someone. Dark brown eyes, with purple hair and a gentle smile like Dr. Matsumoto's. Misato's heart melted when the figure faded away. _Dad. _

"I know."

"…It'll be okay."

Misato did not respond.

* * *

**End Note** - I know this kind of thing won't ever happen but I had this story in my documents file. All three chapters. I'll be editing them as I post them up so don't expect a long wait. I was inspired by a short story that was posted on Every Writer's Resource. It was a long time ago and I tried looking for it but I think they took it down.

…


	2. Petrified

_I don't own them_

* * *

**The Birth of a Universe**

Okinawa-2 was a never-ending dreamscape.

In many colors, the small town numbed him under a hypnosis whenever he ambled through the storage room to the back of the building, catching a glimpse of dark concrete buildings grouped together under light indigo and white rays stemming from the moon. A trail of smoke dissipated in the air from the butt of his cigarette.

Tossing it over the ground, he then pressed his boot-clad foot over it. He studied the white around it pry open to show a brown granular substance, imagining that the cigarette was a body trapped thirty feet below a mountain of debris. His stomach churned in response. He did not hear soft clacks approaching him.

"Aren't you going home, Mr. Ikari?"

Shinji turned to a young woman in a brown and white uniform. Ayumi was a cashier in the General Supermarket. She was the business's hardest worker, a seventeen year old petite girl with mousy brown hair and the thickest spectacles he'd ever seen. He noticed that she was staring at him intensely.

"I'm going to be working later. Just taking a break."

"Oh! Alright. Sorry to bother you," she said. "Have a good night."

He nodded, watching her walking away. "See you tomorrow morning."

Shinji kicked dirt over the cigarette once she disappeared into the building. He retraced his steps to the lined aisles that were almost empty. At six in the evening, there were only about three customers shopping in the supermarket. After making sure Ayumi wasn't around, he changed into his T-shirt and faded blue jeans.

"Going home, boss?" Toji asked near the register, giving change to an elderly man when Shinji walked out of the dressing room in his casual wear.

"Yeah," Shinji said.

"Say hi to good ol' bitch and your wife."

"I'll try to leave out the 'bitch' part for Asuka," Shinji said. "Aren't you coming home tonight?"

"Hell no. I'm working overtime."

"What about Asuka? Your girlfriend?"

Toji shrugged his response. Shinji walked out of the building, spotting his old Grand Prix Nissan in the front of the parking lot. He took out his cell phone from his jean pocket, dialing a number that was burned into his memory.

"Hello?" his wife's voice was slightly horse.

"Hey," he murmured, turning the ignition on. "I'm coming home. Did you go to your appointment today?"

"Yeah. It was just a stomach flu."

He nodded, drove a few feet and turned a sharp corner onto the main avenue of Okinawa-2. He stayed on the phone with her, listening to the sound of her breathing and things moving around. She was probably straightening things out in the kitchen, taking a can of ginger ale from the crate he stored in the refrigerator. He did not hear Asuka's voice yet. Asuka usually visited them every night in the evenings.

"What do you want for dinner?"

"…I'm cooking," she said, sniffing a little, "Sorry. Just a little bummed out tonight."

He paused over the phone, strolling down the rest of the main avenue. At the intersection where the gas station and corner store were, Shinji made a right turn onto the street he took to reach the cul-de-sac where he lived. He suddenly want to move a little faster.

"Is the stomach ache bad?"

"No. The doctor said I was okay. I just feel a little tired and want you home, that's all," she said, her voice indicating that she was smiling over the phone. "Are you almost here?"

He reached the cul-de-sac. "Yeah. I'll be up in a minute."

She hanged up. Shinji parked his car on an empty space near the sidewalk. The apartment complex was taller than the one they lived in years ago in Tokyo-3. The building was similar to their old one. They had enough to purchase a home, but when Misato came back and saw the building during their search, she fell in love. "Like old times," she said, when they first moved in.

Shinji entered the complex, and swiped his card near the gated entrance to get in. Once he got on the elevator, he leaned back to take a deep breath, waiting until the elevator stopped on the eight floor. The door to his apartment was already open, with a familiar fiery red haired woman in a blue dress staring at him as she leaned against the wall next to it.

Asuka was quieter these days. Her loud insults mellowed down into the occasional silent ones she'd throw here and there. She took to staring more, sometimes sitting on the front of the apartment complex looking off into space.

Sizzling meat and vegetables wafted out of the building.

"Toji says hi."

Asuka blinked in surprise, then her eyes narrowed, "Are you sure he didn't say anything else?"

"Positive."

She scoffed, muttering to herself.

He then side hugged the small woman, forcing her body closer and backing away just in time to evade a blow to his arm. He walked into the apartment, sniffing in the pleasant air. Misato was currently easing a pot of steaming rice towards the back of the stove.

She mindlessly tossed mixed vegetables and chicken in the wok, back turned and purple hair down tracing the small of her back. Was it him, or didn't she just cut her hair a month ago?

His arms were around her in no time. Shinji buried in his nose between her shoulder and neck before she flinched. Misato said nothing but melted into his arms.

"That smells good."

"Of course, since it's the only food I practice making each time I'm near the stove," she said drily.

Shinji frowned, but kept his smile when she patted him on the arm. She usually wasn't like this. Misato came in and left the apartment yapping. She always welcomed him home with a noisy kiss, practically toppling him over whenever she jumped in his arms and bear hugged him.

During the first few months since she came back, Shinji was at first scared to have any sort of communication with her. She was Misato, but in a different body. She had the same eyes, lips, smile, but to Shinji, she was a complete stranger. A younger version of herself due to the curse of the LCL on her body, like it did to a number of those who came back.

Misato was understandably heart broken in response to his actions. If it weren't for Asuka's blunt words and thin patience, he wasn't sure if they would be here three years later, having the time of their life in the only lively place in Japan.

"How was work?"

Shinji frowned, saying, "Work was good. How was the appointment?"

"Fine."

"Is there anything you want to tell me?"

"Oh yes. Asuka's going to stay for the night," Misato said, turning off the fire underneath the steaming rice, "She and Toji aren't talking to each other right now."

Shinji momentarily forgot about Misato's strange behavior, "He decided to work late tonight."

"I'm not surprised," Misato said, staring at the stir fry on the fire intently.

"Are you sure you have nothing to say to me?"

"No," she said, now looking at him straight in the face. "Why would you ask such a thing?"

By now, Shinji's sinewy form towered over Misato's own. He was no longer the young boy who dreaded entering the EVA every time he had to save the world. Despite the difference in height, he was still helpless when it came to getting Misato to talk. Misato spoke a lot and was the bubbliest person in the apartment complex, but she knew how to keep to herself.

"I'm just worried."

Her smile never reached her cheeks, "You don't need to worry about me. I'm okay, Shinji-kun."

He watched her finish cooking, turning off the other fire underneath the wok. Misato worked methodically while she plated the meal over the tiny dining table in the living area. Shinji stood there all this time, too wary to consider forgetting the look on Misato's face.

"Asuka! Dinner's ready!"

Asuka did not respond, but Shinji felt her brush past and make her way to the table. He didn't pay attention to the deep frown on the fiery red haired woman's face. He focused on Misato's blank stare as she waited for him to take his seat. "Aren't you eating?"

Shinji slowly nodded, "I'm eating."

…

Ritsuko's phone vibrate violently on her desk. Of course this would happen. Only Misato's number would blare on the front of her phone in the early morning. She sighed, picking it up, "You didn't tell him, did you?"

"No. You're a doctor right?"

"Misato. I'm an engineer, not a doctor. We went to the same college together. Did you ever see me pick a scalpel?"

"Oh, so you can't use a screw driver for an abortion?"

Ritsuko slapped her forehead with her palm, clawing at her now cropped her with her fingers. She looked around her bedroom to make sure no one was near. Maya left to work an hour ago and wasn't going to be back until the afternoon. But Ritsuko knew that given the heated argument they had last night, she was probably going to work more hours.

"Misato. Give me a break."

"Please Ritsuko!" Misato said, her frightened voice lifting each second. "I can't be a mother! I can't take care of another human being! Ritsuko I need to take it out-"

"Misato!"

Her friend's voice mellowed into short tired pants. Ritsuko couldn't help but stay silent as those pants changed into quiet crying. Misato sounded so lost and broken, her voice heavy and choked with sobs. Ritsuko stared at the picture of her, Misato, and Kaji on her desk.

It was the only one salvaged from the ruins in Tokyo-3. At that time, Misato was still lost in the sea when she found it. Ritsuko treasured it as though it had a life of its own. On that day, she realized that Misato was the only person closest to a sister that she had.

"It's six in the morning. Shinji is still at work and I know you're off from work today," Ritsuko said. "Come to my place. I'm going to order take out and make you some tea."

Misato sniffed, "Okay…"

* * *

**End Note** - Extending a little bit. More than three chapters now.


	3. Precious

_I don't own them_

* * *

**The Birth of the Universe**

Ritsuko sipped her jasmine tea, sighing when hot vapor gushed over her lips. The late morning breeze swiftly brushes over her back. The takeout she ordered was set up over the small table between she and Misato, who had yet to take a bite out of her rice. Ritsuko studied the shadows over her friend's blood rimmed eyes.

The other woman looked haggard, even more so in her beige tight dress and light jacket atop her pallid skin. Ritsuko almost wanted to tell Misato that she looked much older than her at this moment. But she kept her mouth shut. Some moments you don't try to make any worse than it is.

"You have to tell Shinji at some point."

"No. I don't want to have this baby," Misato said, repeated the same words she stated when she cried over the phone. "If you can't help me, then I'll find a way."

"And how is that going to happen?" Ritsuko asked. "How will you scrounge up enough yen to leave this country, take your so called abortion, and come back without Shinji at least asking why?"

Misato finally took a bite of her food for the first time.

"Have you ever heard of the big bang?" Ritsuko suddenly asked.

The purple haired woman kept eating, unwilling to share Ritsuko's gaze. Ritsuko placed her cup back on the table, still watching her friend quietly. "The birth of the universe. How everything started? You know about it, right?"

Misato paused, placing her chop sticks back down inside the bowl.

"What does a stupid scientific theory have to do with me?" she asked.

"Everything," Ritsuko said.

Her friend returned to her food.

"Misato. How many children live in this town?"

The purple haired woman knew the answer. There was no need for Ritsuko to ask, but she still did, her heart pulsing as Misato looked up tiredly. They were barely enough children in Okinawa-2 left.

The story shared by the neighbors in the town was a terrible, yet undeniable truth of what happened to the majority of children who were taken away during the Third Impact. Ritsuko's fingers trembled when she reached for her tea again, avoiding Misato's quiet gaze.

"Ritsuko-"

"Forget about what I said," the faux-blonde woman said. "I can't help you do what you want to do. But the choice is yours right? It doesn't matter if I say anything because you're entitled to do anything you want."

Misato looked down, picking at her food again, "Where you ever…"

"Yeah. A month after being with Gendo," Ritsuko said. "He wanted it gone and I didn't know what else to think. I was young and didn't know anything about how the world worked, despite being my mom's daughter. Now that I think about it, I wonder what would have happened. I wonder if the baby would've been a girl and hated me like I hated my mother. I try to find all these excuses just to tell myself that what I did was for the better. I try to tell myself that it would have been better off. But then I'd ask myself if it's really worth blaming your child for your silly mistakes?"

Misato's shoulder's tensed up.

"No matter what you say or do, you and Shinji knew the consequences you were going to face. If you didn't really want this baby, wouldn't you have been a bit more cautious about your actions?" Ritsuko asked.

"…You're right-"

But the blond caught her up to it, "No. I'd rather you do what you wanted to do in the first place. There's a small farm thirty minutes away from here. You can get all the medicine you want to get rid of it. I'd rather have that happen than you keep a baby just because you think it's your obligation to own up to your mistakes."

Misato's eyes glazed over, but Ritsuko sat up, and began clearing the table. In short minutes, she was cleaning up the dishes in the sink, thinking about a small restaurant on the other side of town and trying to convince an angry Maya to forgive her for her callous behavior last night.

She heard Misato whisper to herself, "Why would I want a baby in this world?"

"Why not? It's a new beginning, right?" Ritsuko murmured.

* * *

For some odd reason, Misato thought about her father while she drove home.

It started subtly, like a tiny little itch in the back of her mind. Her father's quiet voice soon clouded her memories. She started to recall memories she never thought she'd ever remember. Her father and mother arguing in the bedroom while she listened, her mother crying every night, her mother cursing at her father over the phone while he responded with, "I'm really sorry dear".

But then she also remembered her father giving her a tour of his work place in Antarctica. His purple hair would shine under the fluorescent light of his laboratory. He'd tell her every detail of devices he'd work on in his spare time, thrilled to see that she loved every moment spending time with him. That was the only time she was happy to be with him, even though she would hate herself for it.

_"Wow, your job is so cool, dad!" _

_ He father grinned, "Wait till you see the best part."_

Misato parked her car near the apartment complex. By now, she successfully willed the memories away. Her father had nothing to do with a baby right now. She swiped her card by the entrance gate, entering the elevator to take a deep breath. She wanted to sleep for the rest of the day. Maybe it would all work out with a little bit of rest.

She took sometime digging out her keys. Once she entered the dark apartment, she went straight for the kitchen, not bothering to turn the lights on. She took out a bottle of water from the fridge, drinking it all in a few gulps. She leaned near the counter, staring at the open living room.

A dark shadow was huddled on the couch. The figure looked up, rendering her hold on the bottle loose. Water spilled all over white tiles. Her father was staring at her.

"Who's that?!"

"Misato, it's me."

Thunder beating within her chest, Misato rubbed her eyes. She looked into the room again to see that Shinji was now there, and not a man who looked eerily like her father. Her husband rose, still in his uniform from work. "I decided to come back and check up on you."

"You left work?"

"Yeah…I just go so worried," he said, walking over in her direction. "You've been quiet lately."

Shinji took the water bottle and disposed of it, throwing plies of paper towel on the floor to clean the mess she made. He gazed at her when he was done. Misato welcomed Shinji, throwing her arms around his neck to hug him close as he held her tightly. His lips traced her temple. He smelled of fresh clean soap and just him, gently overwhelming her senses.

"I just want to make sure you're alright…"

"I know."

"I'm here if you need to tell me anything, Misato."

She nodded.

"How was your day?"

"I'm pregnant."

"I know things are a little tough right now but-"

Shinji froze, still holding her in the same position. He pulled back, his hands gripping her shoulders. In the dark, she was unable to see his face well. But she knew he was looking right at her. Misato mentally steeled herself for the backlash. She waited for him to begin saying the things she hoped he wouldn't say.

"The doctor said that I need to go back for another checkup. I obviously can't get an abortion and I don't want to," Misato said, prying his hands off her shoulders. "I'm not going to even if you ask me to do it because I've made up my mind-"

Misato could not finish saying her last words before Shinji crashed his lips against hers. Her breath stolen, she kissed back as fervently, feeling linoleum slid across the back of her thighs as he lifted her up over the counter.

Misato's tears fell freely, a break from the turmoil she's felt from the past couple of days. She forced herself to pull back, gasping for breath. She still held him tightly, hands clutching his dark hair as he hugged her back just as tightly.

She was terrified, frightened, but with Shinji here with her like this, she knew that everything would be okay. It had to be, she whispered to herself, listening to Shinji's soft comforting words in her ear._ It has to be._

* * *

**End Note:** Epilogue next.


	4. Epilogue

_I don't own them_

…

**The Birth of the Universe**

An unknown girl's soft lilting voice filled the tiny apartment from the tiny radio in the middle of the living room. Misato hummed to the lyrics, taking a small rice cake from the queue she made on the counter.

Looking at her tiny son, propped up on her side with her arm, she gave him the cake to take a bite out of. His little hand gripped her wrist, biting as much as a nine month old could. Rice particles stuck to her fingers as she studied his expression. He ate the rice, kicking his bare feet while bouncing in her arms.

"You like it?" she asked.

He hummed, his molten chocolate eyes glistening as he grabbed her wrist to take another bite out of the rice cake. Misato smiled when he kicked his feet again, clutching the front of her camisole with his rice stained hands. Her son was usually quiet. At one point, Shinji was worried that he was mute, but Misato assured him that she expected for that to happen. "What till he gets older," she told Shinji.

"Don't tell your daddy I used you as a lab rat, okay?"

The baby blinked, then grinned while she lightly tickled his tummy with her finger. Sun beams were shining through the windows, casting a golden highlight over his purple hair and brown eyes. Misato experienced another bout of unmistakable joy. She was reminded of how good it felt to know that this little being loved her unconditionally.

His arrival was a complete surprise. On a Saturday afternoon, she was naked in bed with Shinji because it was too hot and their air conditioner burned out. She experienced insistent back aches throughout the day, and it came back just when she was sleeping deeply. She woke up to go into the kitchen for a glass of water, only for her water to break.

After seventeen hours spent pushing, crying and screaming all at once on the hospital bed, Hiro Ikari was born to both ecstatic parents. He whimpered, breaking out into a cry when the nurses took him away to clean him up. Misato never took her eyes off him, watching his reddened face wrinkled and tiny body wrapped up in a white cloth. When the nurse laid him down in her arms, with him close enough for her to be the first person he saw once he opened his eyes, a strike of recognition surfaced. Her son was looking at her quietly, his gaze strangely calm.

"He's been hearing your voice for the past nine months," a nurse with kind blue eyes said to her. "Your son knows who you are."

Shinji was concerned about the way she stared at the boy intently, as if she was trying to put together a puzzle. Misato was still watching her son that way when Shinji held him, smiling over his sleeping form.

"What are we naming him?" he asked.

Then it hit her. The baby's purple hair, his quiet yet kind dark eyes. He watched her in a way that reminded her of her father. Even when she would yell at the man for not being at home enough, he would still stare at her just as her son did. Her father was always a gentle soul, even if she felt that he did not love her like a father would his own daughter. Now that she gazed at her son, sleeping in his father's arms, she was certain that her father loved her with every fiber of his being.

"Hiro. After my dad."

Misato stared at the sunset while she sat over the couch, listening to a guitar playing before the chorus of the song came back up. Hiro was playing with her hair, using her lap to stand himself up. Misato imagined her father's face looking down over her like the time she left the hospital when she found out she was pregnant. She smiled just as a man with spectacles and purple hair appeared. _You were watching all this time. _


End file.
